The List

In 2009, I decided to make The List, with the help of a close friend of mine. This list contains all the character traits my boyfriend should or should not have. Mind you this was written when I was thirteen, and a complete romantic at heart. I didn’t believe in one night stands, and read Twilight over fifteen times. Enough said. Feel free to laugh your ass off about how naïve I was.

WHAT I WANT IN A BOYFRIEND

1. He should NEVER EVER cheat on me. I’d rather he dump me for another girl than ‘do stuff’ behind my back. So, fidelity is the BIGGEST ELEMENT. No fidelity, no boyfriend. Period.
2. He should care for me a lot
3. I should be able to see through him, and see his soul. He should be good on the inside and the outside.
4. WE MUST have an honest relationship. I believe that trust is the basis of a relationship, whether it’s romantic, familial, or even between friends.
5. WE MUST have an honest relationship. I believe that trust is the basis of a relationship, whether it’s romantic, familial, or even between friends.
6. He should be smart, and funny.
7. He should be nice – as in polite to my friends and family, supportive and encouraging. He must always have love to give me (like an unending supply of love). He should make me happy.
8. He must be strong, mentally and preferably also physically. If he senses that there is something I am, or for that matter anyone else is doing wrong, he must have the courage and strength to come right up, and stop me/ them.
9. He must know his limits. This can be interpreted in several ways, so will not elaborate.
   
   
   Here’s the shallow stuff:
   
   
10. He should be cute.
11. He should have a great body.  He should have one of those complete lifeguard kind of physiques. I could kill for that.
12. He MUST smell good.
13. Preferably not blonde, Because I have a thing against blondes.
14. This could TOTALLY be scratched out, in fact its’ probably not even a valid issue, but having a rich guy as a significant other can’t hurt.
15. Totally scratchable again, but he should  British. That ACCENT!! *Swoon* [A/N: Yes. I wrote swoon. FML]
16. OMG I totally forgot. HE should have an attractive sounding name. And nothing like Ganesh, or Jasvindar or Mohommad or any thing like that. But I guess that Get’s covered because he’s BRITISH.
17. He should be good in (EMBARASSING!!!) bed. Fun and sexy and intense boyfriends don’t kill do they?! 

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YES. THIS IS THE NONSENSICAL SHIT I WROTE WHEN I WAS 13. I WASTED YOUR PRECIOUS TIME, I KNOW. I’M SORRY, I REALLY AM. I PROMISE NOT TO BURDEN YOU WITH SENTIMENTAL BULLSHIT ANY MORE.

Needless to say, my expectations for a boyfriend right now, is almost COMPLETELY different. Hopefully I’ll be able to complete the current version of The List and post it within a few days. I’m going to 12^th grade soon (TOMORROW!!), so I’ll probably be busy with my school, and my SAT classes, and my Maths classes, and my Chemistry classes, and my Physics classes, and my IIT classes. I know… Sucks to be me. Once again, FML.

Sorry about the bitching. (LIE. I’m not sorry at all). I’d like to thank Vini… Congratulations! You’re probably the ONLY person who read my recent updates. Other people, (if any) IF you’ve made it all the way down here, COMMENT. I don’t mind hate mails either. Yes, I’m that desperate. Ok enough ranting, now quickly spread the word of how awesome my blog is.

The Underage Teen

"She's such a bad girl. I've heard that she shows off her Hannah Montana mike all the time. Weird. I would never show off like that. Speaking of Hannah Montana, I want to show you something. Hold your breath... I've finally managed to imitate Hoedown Throwdown, perfectly even. My sister says that I sound exactly like Miley."

There goes my sister... the underage teen. She's lately been acting morely like a 17 year old rather than a 8 year old one. She's constantly oohing and aahing over her cute, male (and hopefully single) classmates. She makes me look so naive. Naive has so got to be an understatement. Well, I'll tell you why... I always hung around with boys, because I was too uncool to have girlfriends. I don't really have any regret, becuase if I had an exceptionally dirty boy sitting next to me, I wouldn't cringe away from the mud all over his clothes... I was too used to it (It's ironic, but I've never wanted a brother, even though I know they can be a whole lot of fun to play with).

Anyway, what would you ususally have on your list to identify a teenager with his/her behaviour?

• Abnormal behaviour? Check. Ayushi never responds to anyone. She's just lost in her own world. Drawing her weird designer clothes she'll make when she grows up. All the time. When we actually want to speak to her, all we get as an acknowledgment is a grunt, or an irritated glance followed by "What now?"


• Weird language? Check. Ayushi always says this weird stuff all the time, which completely goes over her head. When she figures that we didn't get our joke, she just rolls her eyes and says,"Whatever. Forget it. I shouldn't have said anything in the first palce. Why did I even bother?" Of course, she is also very cryptic. You know what I'm saying.


• Different taste for music? Check. Ayushi is crazy about Miley Cyrus a.k.a Hannah Montana. Oh, also a fan of hip hop and rap music.


• Bitching & Backstabbing?Double check. She gossips, spreads rumors, bitches about her own best friends, huh boy, you don't want to listen to the rest of the list - its too long.


• Queen bee? Check. My sister is the ultimate fashionista in all of third grade. She sets the trends, decides what's hot and what's not... Everything. She is the popular girl in her class. One of those superficial, shallow girls (But, mind you, there are two sides to a coin. This is just one side)


• Boy magnet? Check. Sorry, its confidential. No comments.


• Potential Super Model? She's absolutely capable of turning up on the cover of Vanity Fair, Vogue or maybe even GQ.

Well, there goes my sister... the undreage teen. I often wonder what she'll grow up to be. An old soul? As much as I wish it was true, its highly unlikely. She could probably continue with her...stuff. She'll probably act like a tween. Well, who knows?

I also have to give her this. She's extremely intelligent. She learns faster than the average 8 year old. She understands better. Reads books for older kids. And what's more? She's a straight A+ student. Trust me on this one - she's never got a single grade lower than A. Amazing. Oh, did I mention? She's also very talented - she can draw, dance, sing, she's an excellent athlete too. She is also a very perceptive person. I get all my advices from her when I'm in a dilemma. I tell her all my secrets (She can not gossip when she wants to), she covers up for me when I probably didnt drink my water, clean up the bed or didnt eat my fish. This is the other side of the coin. This is her - my sister, Ayushi.

Oh look! I see three girls reading... Shakespear? Hey! That's my copy of As You Like It! There goes my sister...the underage teen.

Adolescence At Age 7

Latitudinal Extent
Europe lies in the cool temperate zone, which is the main reason behind its predominantly temperate climate. Only a small part of Europe, which lies in the frigid zone has a low temperature.

Nearness To The Sea
The deep penetration of the sea into the mainland brings its moderating influence on the climate...

"Eeep! Wow. It would be so awesome!"
"God, I can't believe this. SHAHID KAPOOR!!!"

Trust me. When you have a zero concentration level and you're studying the climate of Europe, nothing can be worse. This is what I thought. Around 30 seconds back. Before the hooligans int my living room started screeching.

Fuming, I stomped off to the place where my sister, Ayushi, and her 2 partners in crime were screaming.

You would probably expect me to do this next: Pull my sister to one corner of the room and glare at her for a minute or two with my hands on my hips; the intensity of the glare hot enough to burn up all the books I own (Trust me, that's a strong glare). Maybe you would even think that I would say,"Why the hell don't you girls ever pipe down? You know that I'm trying to study! And you also know that I hate studying and cannot under any circumstances concentrate for more than 10 seconds!"

But no, I didn't. Instead, I stopped short on my way. No, it doesn't have to do with any kind of sympathy or guilt. As soon as my brain began to register their 'conversation', I stopped short.

This is how it went.

My sister's BFF no. 1: Oh Ayushi! It would be so lovely if Shahid Kapoor (shrieks again) replaces that stupid partner of yours. I think Aryan Baweja is useless. Hai na Supriya?

Ayushi's BFF no. 2: Totally! (sighs) But, you know what, Aryan is NOT useless. He's good.

Ayushi: Do you people like boys? (Boys a topic of conversation already?!)

BFF 1: I hate boys.

BFF 2: Me too.

Ayushi: I LOVE boys!

There How would you react to this? Well, I got completely freaked out. This is what & year olds' girl talk is supposed to be? Coming from to the man of their dreams, the famous dance instructor turned - junior artists turned - turned superstar man. He's done a movie , a Hindi movie called Jab We Met, with his ex.

This is a typical Hindi movie scene. The girl, decides to run away from home, along with a boy. Only, they haven't fallen in love..yet.

My mom was watching the movie on YouTube when we just happened to want the computer at the same time (me and my sister). Who can resist a movie? The heroine is talking. Then the talks. Suddenly, I glance sideways to check on the time.

I see Ayushi looking at the screen a little too intently. Ayushi, sighing and looking at Shahid Kapoor as if he was God. Every time he smiled, she did too. Isn't this too much of a coincidence? The 'smiling- at - the - same - time'?

If this is what they are now, at age 7, talking about boys, wishing for boyfriends, crushing on classmates, I have no idea what they will be when they will be like when they are 13.

Being a teen can be hell,

Being a teen can be heaven.

But this is too much,

Adolescence at seven!